It’s the episode we’ve all been waiting for – the Love Triangle season three reunion has finally dropped, and it’s messier than a Macca’s drive-thru at 3am.

The reckoning has arrived and special guest host Chrishell Stause isn’t mucking around.

Dressed in head-to-toe judgement and ready to throw down, she holds this chaotic crew of singles accountable for their crimes against dating, common sense and televised decency.

First in the firing line? Mike Gunner – yes, that Mike – the Married At First Sight alumni who clearly walked into this experiment thinking it was a sequel to his last one. Spoiler: It’s not.

He was pulled up quick-smart over his treatment of Melissa and Melinda. His response? A cocktail of denial, defensiveness and a sprinkle of casual sexism.

‘Nah, that’s not right,’ he whines, before digging himself into a deeper hole by bringing up that Melissa is a mum. ‘I’ve dated single mums before, and they’re usually kind.’

It’s the episode we’ve all been waiting for – the Love Triangle season three reunion has finally dropped, and it’s messier than a Macca’s drive-thru at 3am

The reckoning has arrived and special guest host Chrishell Stause (pictured) isn’t mucking around

He then starts mumbling about ‘moral superiority’ and being picked on, as if he’s the victim here and not the walking red flag he’s been all season.

Thankfully, we move on – straight into heartbreak territory with Payton and Jordan.

On the surface, they’ve made it work. Cute! Except, no.

We’re forced to relive Jordan’s jaw-dropping comments from earlier in the season where he described Payton in terms no man should ever utter unless he’s ready to be publicly shamed on national TV.

‘I asked for small, tanned, ethnic,’ he once declared, as though ordering a side dish.

Watching Payton sob as these words are replayed is genuinely hard to stomach.

The poor woman held it together all season while this guy treated her like an afterthought.

Jordan’s apology comes only after Chrishell pries it out of him with the grace of a reality TV dominatrix.

First in the firing line? Mike Gunner – yes, that Mike – the Married At First Sight alumni who clearly walked into this experiment thinking it was a sequel to his last one. Spoiler: It’s not

 He’s pulled up quick-smart over his treatment of Melissa and Melinda. His response? A cocktail of denial, defensiveness and a sprinkle of casual sexism

‘There is the reason of clout,’ she purrs, delivering a line so cutting it could be used to slice prosciutto.

Jordan just stares, like a man who’s only just realised actions have consequences. Spoiler: they do. Payton deserves better. Period.

Next? Ari and Nuri. The couple we genuinely thought might go the distance. But no – they’ve split.

Apparently the long-distance thing was too much, which is odd considering Ari’s still thinking of moving to the Gold Coast?

Nuri says he might be open to revisiting the relationship… if she moves to him. That’s when Chrishell delivers the line of the night: ‘After that answer, Ariana, I would say do not pack your bags.’

Pack. Unpack. Repack your self-worth, queen.

Now onto Bernie – aka the human embodiment of an ick.

The man has spent the whole season bouncing from woman to woman like a Labradoodle on red cordial, and now it’s time to watch him squirm.

Thankfully, we move on – straight into heartbreak territory with Payton and Jordan (pictured)

We’re forced to relive Jordan’s jaw-dropping comments from earlier in the season where he described Payton in terms no man should ever utter unless he’s ready to be publicly shamed on national TV

We rewind to Bernie’s charming commentary about Jazmin: ‘I was expecting this one to be hot.’ Classy!

Jazmin, the goddess she is, tells him to work on himself. And honestly, if she had handed him a therapist’s card and an Uber voucher, it would’ve been fair.

But the drama isn’t done. Enter Chloe. Yep – Bernie and Chloe’s sneaky hookup plays out on screen and Emma and Beck both visibly combust. They are blindsided.

Bernie’s been tongue-wrestling Chloe while still ‘exploring’ things with the others. It’s the romantic equivalent of hoarding takeout menus.

Still, the twist none of us saw coming? Bernie dumped Chloe the night before the reunion.

Yes, after all the lying, kissing, crying and faux-deep chats about ‘connection’, he pulled the pin the night before he was meant to defend their love on national television.

Men really will do anything but go to therapy.

When called out, Bernie insists he paid for a romantic trip, so clearly he was serious.

Now onto Bernie – aka the human embodiment of an ick. The man has spent the whole season bouncing from woman to woman like a Labradoodle on red cordial, and now it’s time to watch him squirm

We rewind to Bernie’s charming commentary about Jazmin: ‘I was expecting this one to be hot.’ Classy!

But the drama isn’t done. Enter Chloe. Yep – Bernie and Chloe’s sneaky hookup plays out on screen and Emma and Beck both visibly combust. They are blindsided

When called out, Bernie insists he paid for a romantic trip, so clearly he was serious. ‘That’s literally the playbook of f**kboys,’ Chrishell shoots back, barely blinking

‘That’s literally the playbook of f**kboys,’ Chrishell shoots back, barely blinking.

From there it’s carnage. Bernie gets defensive. Chrishell isn’t having it. At one point, even Mike tells Bernie to take accountability – and when Mike is telling you off, it might be time to reflect.

Final verdict: Never go toe-to-toe with a woman who survived Selling Sunset. Especially not one holding your receipts in HD.

And that’s a wrap on Love Triangle Season 3 – a smouldering pile of breakups, regret, and emotional whiplash.

Did anyone find lasting love? Unclear. Did we get the explosive drama we signed up for? Absolutely. Did Chrishell Stause just cement herself as Australia’s newest reality TV icon? 100 per cent.

Until next season, singles. May your triangles be less toxic and your apologies come before the group playback.